I Dive In

GaoI Vang
Freshman
MSU

Almost to the edge I stand, I prepare myself
The bitterness I've sunken myself into, it was not worth my soul
I no longer care of the slander that escapes their lips
Because drowning myself in their pit of pressure is like stabbing myself through the heart with a dagger
My expressions may give away as a lonesome character
But that doesn't mean my thoughts are unclear for you to overtake
Now, I'm not a disturbed person who's easily influenced by that kind of nature
You tried to fit me into a perfect box
But I'm a box with too many corners, too many ups and down like a roller coaster
The person I've become, you hate
All the effort I put in was a waste
You make me feel like I'm freakin' worthless
Like I had no purpose
I've become a little more selfish, a little more careless
The things I do seems reckless
You give me the cold eyes to put me down
My tears use to threaten to fall out
But now my heart is too stone to feel all of that
Hate my irresponsibility but this is MY reality
I took all your negativity as encouragement for me to become a stronger person
If you don't have my back, I still have myself
If it has to be, I will go on living alone and die alone
I will not break down any longer
Breaking out of this caged wall that was built to keep me lock
I dive in to retrieve what I've lost and that is to live for me and just myself.